Ganesha and the Ganapati Festival

My travels to India have coincided with two major events - Independence Day and now the Ganapati Festival. Since the festival started yesterday, I thought I'd give you some info on the festival and on Ganesha.

First, let's talk about Ganesha. Shree Ganesha, or Ganapati as he is also known, is one of the most well-known and venerated representations of God (Brahman) to the Hindu faith. He is the first born son of Shiva and Parvati. You'll have to look them up to get a better understanding of the relationship.

As you can see, Ganesha is depicted as a big bellied, one tusked elephant and is often either sitting atop a mouse or accompanied by one. Ganesha is a much beloved and frequently invoked divinity, since he is the Lord of Good Fortune who provides prosperity and fortune and also the Destroyer of Obstacles of a material or spiritual order (for more info consult Wikipedia). I've noticed several of my friends have a Ganesha sitting on the dashboard of their cars.

The festival started yesterday and will culminate on September 6th with the immersion of countless Ganesha statues into bodies of water all over India. The statue pictured above is the largest in Hyderabad. We were told "It's crowded and crazy, don't go" by the hotel staff, but I was joined by two fellow Americans who were determined to see it. So we hopped in an auto and cruised over to the area. It was packed. And we were the only three non-Indians in the crowd, so were greeted with smiles and a few odd stares of curiosity. After wading into the masses, we stopped to pay our respects to the statue, took some pictures and headed down a side street.

Now you might be asking about that immersion thing. There has been much discussion about the idea of putting tons of statues into already polluted waters and they've tried to address the problem. All of the statues have to be degradable. I don't say bio-degradable because clearly the paints and lacquer they use aren't good for any fish who might be living in the lake or ocean. On the 6th, the road around the Hussein Sagar will be packed with people watching the cranes lift the Ganesha statues and submerge them into the water. I've already been warned that I shouldn't go due to the crowds. So I'll just watch it on one of the 11 news stations I can choose from.

Ok, back to my story. After the visit to the statues we stopped in front of a small temple. We could see the lights and hear the music from inside. Out of the blue, an older gentleman appeared on the street and said "Please come in. This is a JainTemple and you are welcome." So off went the shoes and we joined the devotees in song and clapping. Well we clapped and listened, but did not attempt to sing. It was a fun experience.

After finding an auto driver willing to take us back to our hotel, we decided to head back. At that very moment, the skies opened up with torrential rains. Now the hotel has a strict rule about letting autos (rickshaws) past the front gate. They're simply not allowed. But given the rain, we told him to just ignore the rule and that we'd pay any fine the hotel tried to hit him with. The security guard at the gate tried to stop us, but when he saw it was three stupid Americans, he waved us in. As we rolled up to the front door, right behind a very nice Mercedes, the hotel staff took one look and just laughed.

Good times.

I Really Should Listen to My Own Advice

I always preach about the importance of agreeing on prices when you travel BEFORE you hire a guide or take a cab. Well, for some reason I decided my advice was bunk and I was going to just wing it for a day in Mumbai. Bad idea.

Started off with the cab ride. Hotel cars are expensive, so I opted for a regular taxi. I'd been told it was about 100-150 rupees to get to the Gateway of India, where I planned to catch a boat to Elephanta Island. When we got there, he said it was 250 rupees. I disagreed and he said "I'm hotel taxi, more expensive." I pointed out the obvious similarity between his black and yellow taxi and the other cabs parked around us. I asked him what the difference was and he replied "I have card" and he handed over a laminated price sheet. The sheet had two columns, one for non a/c and one for a/c. The price for a/c was indeed listed at 250 rupees, however his car didn't have a/c. I finally just paid him 200 rupees and told him no need to wait for me, as I was never getting in his car again. My guess is that he may still be waiting.

Buying the boat ticket was easier. 120 r's for an express boat, 80 r's for the slower one. Only problem - there were no "express" boats. I paid the 10 rupee roof surcharge and climbed up top. I was then visited by a series of vendors trying to sell me postcards, water (even though I already had a huge bottle in my hand), necklaces, chips of some kind, and again necklaces. Thank god the boat finally left port. After a painfully slow cruise, I finally reached the island. And the real fun began.

I was immediately greeted by a guide who walked me up the long flight of steps up to the temple. He had grown up on the island and lived there with his wife and two sons. He told me about the tourist season being later in the year, and how they all relied on that time to earn enough money for the rest of the year. At that point, I should have stopped and asked his price. I didn't. I was in a hurry though, as I had a flight to catch at 6:20 p.m. He showed me the temples (quite interesting) and walked me to the top of the hill to see the old WWII cannon the British had installed as defense against whomever tried to attack. Saw some monkeys, a bull, and some women with milk jugs on their heads who tried to take a picture with me (50 rupees). After the tour we headed back to the dock to grab a beer and wait for the next boat back to Mumbai.

The restaurant was clearly owned by one of his buddies. The menu said beers were 90 rupees for a big bottle, so I figured I was going to be buying him a beer and the cost was reasonable. Also ordered some chicken dish (60 rupees) and he ordered some peanuts. After he chugged his beer he ordered another. And then another. Then I got the bill. 610 rupees! I asked him why it was so high and he said "Oh that includes tax and tip." Right. Sure it does. Tipping isn't a very common thing here, and I can guarantee I was just being charged the ripoff price.

This is the point where he also said his fee was 1500 rupees for the tour. 1500? Say it ain't so Babu. I said no way, and we bickered over the price. He came down to 1100 rupees and I thought I should just cut my losses and run. Big problem though: after I'd just paid his overpriced beer tab, I was sitting there with only 550 rupees left. I told him if I'd know that I wouldn't have bought his damn beers and probably would have just walked the temples by myself. I don't think he quite understood me when I told him I only had that much cash, because he insisted he could take US money. And I forgot to mention he'd paid my entrance fee to the temple (250 rupees). He mentioned I could use a credit card, so we walked to the end of the pier. Then he asked for his money, and I reminded him again that I only had about 550 rupees and that he'd said I could pay with a credit card. He said "Oh, we have to walk back up there for that" and pointed to the top of the 126 steps we'd come down about 20 minutes prior.

This is where my Irish temper blew up. I yelled at him and said something to the tune of "I told you that I didn't have any cash. Why did we just walk all the way over here?!?" Off we went back up the hill to a store that had a credit card machine. The owner tried to call to get authorization but the line never picked up. Clearly seeing the smoke coming out of my ears, the guide finally caved and said he'd take what cash I had. But now I'd missed my boat and had to wait for the next one, which happened to be the same slow one that I'd come over on.

We finally docked at about 4:30 in the midst of a torrential downpour. I saw a taxi and asked him if he could take me to the ITC Grand Sheraton. He said "Yes, ITC" and we drove off. Remember, I have no money and my flight leaves in an hour and half. Taxi man starts to make a turn where I know he isn't supposed to, so I told him he was going the wrong way. He listened but still had no clue where he was going. I knew I was in serious trouble at this point: Me giving directions to an Indian cabbie.

After driving me around in the middle of a very crummy part of town and stopping four times to ask for directions, we finally made it to the hotel. It was now 5:40. I ran into to check out and get him some money. He tried to tell me it was 300 rupees for the ride and I said "You got me lost, I'm going to miss my plane and I'm not paying for the extra kilometers you racked up because you didn't know where you were going." The hotel staff intervened on my behalf and told me to pay him 100 rupees. I felt bad, so I gave him 200. He wasn't happy, but whatever.

Oh, and I missed my flight and had to stay another night in Mumbai. Lovely.

Hitler: The Restaurant?

Ok, you know the old Mel Brooks movie The Producers? Spoof musical on Hitler with the classic song "Springtime for Hitler and Germany." Well apparently some enterprising moron in Mumbai thought it was a good idea to name his new restaurant "Hitler's Cross" and decorate it with swastikas and pictures of Hitler. Nice. Only problem is he isn't saying it's a joke or a spoof. He's serious!

I swear to god the guy was quoted in the local paper saying "Hitler conquered Europe, and we're going to conquer your taste buds." Yeah, Hitler killed people. Lot's of innocent people. Maybe he's just warning people that you'll get so sick from his food that you might die?

What a great idea! Let's name a happy, lively restaurant after him! How about "Pol Pot's Cambodian Kitchen" or "Stalin's Russian Tea House" as a few other ideas slick? You could branch out and corner the market for obscenely stupid restaurant names.

And the freaking mayor of Navi Mumbai (New Mumbai) came to the opening! As did some Bollywood star who was quoted as saying "I've not read much about the man, but I find the use of his name amusing" Huh? Amusing? Clearly you've not read a book written in the last 60 years. Another example of why film or music stars, regardless of where they're from, are complete morons. And I don't think Hitler was including the people of the Indian sub-continent in his definition of a master race.

As a matter of fact, Hitler and his buddies were equal opportunity murderers. They killed Jews, Ukrainians, Russians (Civilians & POWs), Poles, Yugoslavians, Gypsys, Spaniards, Czechs, Americans, Brits, Nepalese, Greeks, the disabled, Jehovah's Witnesses, Boys & Girl Scouts (huh?), Priests, and even other Nazis who disagreed at times. I'm sure there were Indians in there too.

Can you imagine doing something like this in the west? Hell no. The tiny Jewish population of Mumbai is up in arms. Any rational, sane person in the country should share their outrage. Imagine if someone opened a bar that either mocked or insulted Nehru or Gandhi? The owner would be dead and the place torched in minutes.

My point? Everyone should be greatly annoyed with this guy. I need to go find a local Girl Scout troop to help me protest.

You say Mumbai, I say Bombay...

Ok, it is now known as Mumbai but some of the locals I met still call it by its colonial name of Bombay. Either way, I just spent the weekend in this huge, chaotic and cosmopolitan city.

Started off fine. Flight was only 45 minutes late and my car was waiting for me. As we left the airport, I quickly realized the stark contrasts I was about to encounter. As you depart the domestic airport (they have two airports separated by 6-7 kms) you drive through what is supposedly the largest slum in Asia. It was packed and there were school kids in uniforms walking home, commerce of every kind taking place on the streets and an unimaginable collection of garbage everywhere.

The hotel I had picked was beautiful but in the worst location possible for my meeting and for being close to the tourist spots. This distance from tourist spots will be featured in its own post - I can't wait to share that experience with you. The ITC Sheraton Grand Central was just that: grand in luxury and central in location (central Mumbai that is). I checked in and realized I was running a bit late for my meeting. I hired a hotel car and realized I had to go back past the airport and then some. I was late. I can't tell you the name of where I was, but it was nice. All new buildings with Greek-inspired architecture, smooth roads and swanky shops. I also saw my first non-scrawny dog here. Of course as soon as we left the meeting and headed back, we were right in the middle of another rutted road.

On Saturday I headed out for the Gateway to India monument and some siteseeing. The cab driver ended up being my tour guide for the next four hours and showed me around the southern part of the city. Much of the area is made up of colonial era British architecture and most of those buildings could use a good power washing. I wanted to call up the tourist board and tell them they had architectural gems just sitting there, waiting to be exploited.

The Gateway to India monument was built in the early 1900s in honor of the King's visit to Bombay. It's now a prominent symbol of the city and a gathering spot for locals, beggars and tourists. Saying "No" will get you nowhere here - just ignore anyone who is talking to you and go about your business.

Across the street from the Gateway is the famous and elegant Taj Palace Hotel. Built by Indian industrialist JN Tata in 1903, this places screams "money!" and has room prices that most of us couldn't afford. The story is he built the hotel after being snubbed by a European hotel for being a "native." Tata is now one of the biggest India companies and has their fingers in everything. I'm sure the ancestors of that European hotel owner now operate a chip shoppe in some backwater English village. I strolled through the hotel and had an overpriced beer in the bar. With security tailing me, I quickly left the premises and headed to less costly environs.

Next up was the University of Mumbai campus (pictured at top of this page). Built in the 1850s, it could have been plucked from England and dropped here. I was pleased to see some major renovation taking place on the Convocation Hall and no one seemed to mind it when I rolled through the Library on a book cart.

The rest of the tour consisted of Marine Drive, Chowpatty Beach, Mani Bhavan (where Ghandi stayed while in town), the Jain temple and the Hanging Gardens. Also drove by the Haji Ali Mosque and got some pics from afar.

My plans to go out with friends of friends were quickly dashed after I met a crazy American I will call Okie and his German friend "Sideshow Klaus" in the hotel. We ended up staying at the hotel and closing down the bar (which is easy since they close at 11:30).

Next up: Why I should listen to my own advice, Indian style.

Independence Day!

I love holidays. Time to hang out with friends and family, grill a steak, drink some good wine/cold beer, and just relax. So when I found out I was going to be here for August 15th (Indian Independence Day), visions of a day spent at the pool sipping a Kingfisher flashed before my eyes.

Oh was I disappointed.

Turns out we did get the day off, as the offices are all closed. (Sidebar: If you open your office, you run the risk of the police dropping in and giving you a citation) . So I had that going for me, which was nice.

The real disappointment was that Independence Day is also a dry day. Yes, dry. No beer. No wine. No Listerine. Nothing. And of course I couldn't grill anything for fear of burning down the hotel and that little detail about no beef. So I opted for a lamb pizza and a bottle of water. Woohoo!

The day is a big deal here, as it marks the founding of modern India and the exit of British colonial rule. Prior to Independence, India was really a collection of 130+ separate kingdoms. So forging a national identity to tie the very diverse population together has been important. I'll give you more about that diversity in a future post.

For those of you thinking "No way he let a simple law get in his way of having a drink," I capped off the wild day with a card game in my room chased down with two overpriced bottles of wine we'd bought from the bar the night before. Thank god for planning - and being tipped off by a very smart bar manager who knew an easy sale when he saw one.

I wonder if I'll be able to find turkey here on Thanksgiving?

Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna...

Remember those orange robed, bald headed guys who used to hang out in Westwood Village chanting? Turns out they have a huge temple in Bangalore. Iskon Temple is operated by the International Society for Krishna Consciousness, better known in the US as the Hare Krishnas.

The temple is relatively new and is quite impressive. We joined the huge throngs of Krishna devotees (I saw maybe two other tourists besides me) in the line while waiting for it to open. Like many aspects of queuing here, it's apparently acceptable to just walk right in front of everyone and cut the line. So you have to be comfortable with people touching you and be just as ready to push them back. Also take great care to protect your wallet.

We had to check our shoes and cameras at the gate, and proceeded bare foot across a long footbridge. Once you get into the temple you proceed through a number of shrines and immediately hear the murmur of people chanting "Hare Krishna, Hare Krishna, Krishna, Krishna..." over and over again. I think someone told me they have to say the mantra 180 times a day in order to reach a certain spiritual level. Don't quote me on that, I'm sure you can learn more on their website.

These guys also know how to make a buck. As you exit the main shrine you proceed through a book stall, into a shopping gallery, past exhibits advertising the many good things the Society is doing in the region (ex. free meals for people who live near the temple), a cinema (sorry, it's not an IMAX yet), more shopping stalls, an open air food bazaar, a spot where they give away some sort of warm, sweet rice dessert to all visitors, then a spot where they hand out free copies of the Krishna mantra, and finally a sit-down restaurant. I was impressed.

I never did see anyone in an orange robe. And no one tried to give me a "free" flower either. What a bummer!

Bangalore: The Garden City

Even with the terror warnings, I had travel plans to keep. This weekend: Bangalore.

I decided to catch a Saturday morning flight instead of trying to make it to the airport on Friday evening. Did I mention the traffic sucks here? After all of the warnings, I found the domestic terminal to be a piece of cake. Breezed through check-in and security without a hitch. As I should have expected, the flight was delayed. No reason, just delayed. I flew Jet Airways, a private Indian airline with a large domestic route and a practice of charging foreigners fares three times higher than they charge locals. Imagine if United tried that? "Sir, you're clearly not from around here. Your fare today will be $263. Oh, Mr. Fox, you Irish devil, your fare is only $87." Hello, ACLU? Or is that the ICLU?

Thanks to Jen D., I'd been able to connect with her good friend Jessica, a new resident (and newlywed) of Bangalore. She and her husband Kishore picked me up at the hotel and took me to lunch, a driving tour of the city and then to a night spot for dinner and drinks. Made for a great day. NOTE: Jen and Peter, I'm on strict orders to convince you to come visit. I will even insure (policy value is 100 rupees) your food safety (disclaimer: offer valid only if you starve yourself during the trip). Seriously, you must visit them.

First thing I noticed about Bangalore was there was greenery. In Hyderabad the only green you'll see is on a plate or on a woman's sari. Grass? Nope. Trees? Occasionally. But in Bangalore there were old trees, grass medians, flower boxes hanging from lightposts, and large parks with wide lawns. And no potholes! The roads were also less chaotic than Hyderabad.

Bangalore is the original "Silicon Valley" of India and is the home of many US and European (and Indian) software companies. It is also is a big military city, so things just seem more orderly. Smart shops, great pubs, good food, auto's with meters, nice hotels, and a mini version of Windsor Castle.
This picture was taken while a security guard with a rifle was trying to yell at me to not take a picture. I told my driver to ignore him and drive very fast away from the insane man yelling. Lucky for me, I was paying the driver and he was more than happy to speed away. This is Bangalore Castle, the former home of the last rulers of this state. It was built in the late 1800s and remained in their family until recently. I was unclear if they still own it - Lonely Planet says they do, my driver said the government owned it. All I know is the guy with the rifle was pissed and was last heard yelling "50 rupees for a picture!!"

We visited two temples - one pictured at the top of this post and one you'll read about in a later post. Only thing you should know is that I walked barefoot down the street and was thanking myself for the tetanus shot I had six years ago. The bottom of my feet are now brown and I don't think they'll fade anytime soon. There was a little boy in front of the above temple asking for money. I had nothing small enough to share, but Jessica gave him a 5 rupee note. His reaction was classic - he smiled and danced around as if he'd won the lotto. He ran quickly to his mother to give her the money and then came back for an encoure.

We ended the day on the top floor of a rather tall building on MG Road. It was a very swanky pub with the usual beautiful people (and me) sipping cocktails and admiring the view. Nice way to end the day. Big thanks to Jessica and Kishore.

One last thing: Why does every single driver try to take me to an art studio or craft store? I had to tell the last driver to just forget his tip if he tried to stop at one more store. He happily obliged. But you'll all be getting a carved elephant for Christmas.

Terror Threat in India

Just a quick note to address the recent bombing threats announced by the US Embassy here in India. Keep in mind that India has been living with real life terrorism since 1947. As of now, I have yet to hear one single Indian say a word about concerns or fear or panic regarding the announcement. And I have yet to see one word of the threat in the Indian press or tv. They had been planning for possible problems in the run up to Independence Day (Tuesday, 15th of August). So given that India is very sensitive to the topic, and I see no panic, I will be staying the course.

But thank you to those of you who've e-mailed me - I'm good and appreciate the messages. Now if someone from my family actually e-mailed me...

Religion in India

We all know India as a primarily Hindu nation. Did you know India also has the second largest Muslim population in the world? They also have Christians (mostly Catholic), Sikhs, Jains, Buddhists, Jews, Parsis' and a smattering of other faiths. So even though it is a Hindu nation, the Prime Minister is a Sikh and all of the other religions are represented at all levels of government within the country. Pretty diverse huh?

By the numbers there are 855m Hindus, 178m Muslims, 25m Christians, 20m Sikhs, 8m Buddhists, 4.5m Jains, and 8m in the smaller groups.

I was very familiar with all of these faiths except for Jainism. Jainism teaches that every human is responsible for his/her actions and all living beings have an eternal soul or jīva. It insists that we live, think and act respectfully and honor the spiritual nature of all life. They are the original vegans and practice non-violence. Although small in numbers, they've had major influence on India. Gandhi adopted his non-violence approach from them. Dr. Martin Luther King Jr. adopted it from Gandhi, and thus Jainism had a major impact on the U.S. civil rights movement. I bet you didn't know that?

In Hyderabad it is very common to see Muslim women in the full head to toe black outfit with only their eyes showing walking next to a Hindu woman in a sari. For men, you see some Muslim men dressed in traditional clothing and some (very few) Hindu men wearing the male equivalent of a sari. If you work for a large Indian or MNC office, women are allowed to wear the traditional sari but men are required to wear "modern" clothing. A bit of a double standard, but no one seems to mind.

The hotel bar manager happens to be a Catholic. He asked me if Catholics in the U.S. practiced the same rituals and had the same beliefs. He seemed genuinely surprised when I told him yes and recited a few examples. That bit of Catholic knowledge got me a free beer!

Thank you to Father McGovern, wherever you are. I did actually learn something in CCD after all.

Mr. President

Mr. President of Tajikistan that is.

Turns out Hyderabad is a popular spot for foreign political and business leaders to visit. Bill Clinton visited here when he was president, and George W. was here earlier this year. Bill Gates and Michael Dell have passed through - and employ thousands in Hyderabad. So why not the president of Tajikistan?

Tajik President Emomali Rahmonov was in town for a visit and happened to stay at my hotel. I didn't get to meet him, but I did meet a good number of his fierce looking security detail when my elevator door opened on the floor where he was staying. They stared, I stared. They snarled, I waved and smirked. I quickly closed the elevator door and fled to my room.

We all know about motorcades. DC is famous for them. Want to know the difference between a DC motorcade and Hyderabad motorcade? It's easy to quickly close streets in DC and its not easy here. Instead they shut the entire route down for an hour or so. In a city that already suffers from massive gridlock, you can imagine how much fun that can be. But since this is India, it really didn't faze anyone (except me) that it took an hour to go 2 kms.

Thank you Mr. President!

An Afternoon Drive Thru Hyderabad

After my autorickshaw adventure, I decided I should probably consult a local before venturing out again on Sunday. Lucky for me, I have an old work friend from Hyderabad who offered to take me to brunch and show me around town. This was a much more pleasant experience.

After a nice brunch at Fusion 9, a popular spot among the local elite and expat community, we drove off into the old city, where Anoop pointed out various buildings and gave me the history of the city. Hyderabad has attracted a huge influx of people from all over India, but Anoop is a native. As a native, he's proud of the city's history and made sure I saw at least a few of the old buildings which dot the older part of the city. We drove around the Charminar (pictured above) and around the markets that surround it. It was crowded but apparently is worse on other days. They've talked of making the area a pedestrian zone, but its unlikely that will happen. It is in this neighborhood I saw what is fairly common in India: a posse of cows just walking down the street, oblivious to traffic. I'd seen a cow and calf earlier in the day, but they weren't free range cows. I can only imagine how many people crash cars and two wheelers trying to avoid the bovines.

Also visited one of the former palaces of the last ruler of Hyderabad. This region was ruled by a series of kings called the Nizams. Nizam VII ruled the area until Indian Independence in 1947 and he was responsible for many building projects throughout the city and region. At one time he was one of the richest men in the entire world - they say in current dollars, richer than the Sultan of Brunei (and that guy is loaded). He was forced off the throne by the Indian Army (he wanted to join Pakistan or stay independent) and lived the rest of his life in Hyderabad.

Here is the former palace. It's now a museum named after Nizam the VII. From the outside it looks like it's going to fall down. Part of it houses the museum, the rest is a college. Apparently the Nizam's granddaughter still lives on the property but is a recluse. No pics of the inside because they want to charge me 50 rupees PER picture. No thanks! We were also the only visitors there, so I'm sure my money would have helped a bit.

Nizam VII had invested heavily in infrastructure and education - the infrastructure which still supplies Hyderabad with water, and the education system which is driving the current economic growth. I'm sure he'd be proud of the current economic boom ripping through his former kingdom.

Monsoons, Autorickshaws and Fares

I'm sure you've all heard about the monsoons that pop up around this part of the world. The word "monsoon" is used to label the season in which the wind blows from the southwest in India and adjacent areas that is characterized by very heavy rainfall, and specifically the rainfall that is associated with this wind. A better way to describe it is "raining cats & dogs." I thought I'd dodged the monsoon season, but last week we were pummeled by a series of storms. The storms killed at least 80 people in the state and destroyed many villages. It caused substantial damage in Hyderabad as well. The overall amount of rain wasn't huge (5 inches), its that it fell quickly and the drainage is non-existent. It did cause my 20 minute commute to the hotel to turn into an hour, but I can't complain. I could have been one of those guys riding by me on scooters.

Exploring Hyderabad is not as simple as just walking out of the hotel and strolling the avenues. For one thing, there are very few sidewalks. If there were any, those appear to have been ripped up to make way for road widening projects. So walking is kind of "at your own peril" kind of propositions. As one who values life, I have decided to walk on streets only in cases of dire emergency.

With the desire to see some of the sites, I decided I didn't want to pay the hotel car to drive me around. So I walked out and hopped into an autorickshaw - not something many would suggest a tourist do. I had him drive me up to Golkonda Fort, an ancient fortress perched on a hilltop. The drive was like a triple E ticket at Disneyland. I had no idea if this chap was going to just drive around for an hour and dump me somewhere (I could have taken him!) or just running up his tab. I learned a valuable lesson - always settle on a price before you actually drive off. He got me there safely and waited for me to tour the fort (it was an impressive, but full of trash). Also experience the concept of differential pricing. There are always two prices in India - one for locals, and one for tourists. The tourist price isn't just aimed at those of us with fair skin. They also apply it to Indians from abroad. In this case, fort admission was 5 rupees for locals, and 100 rupees for me. We then toured around the huge, man made lake Hussein Sagar (constructed in the 1500's). The lake also features a huge statue of Buddha. This region used to be a Buddhist intellectual center, but there are few, if any Buddhists still here.

Now back to that price for the ride. When we got back to the hotel he said "600 rupees" and I just smiled. I'd been informed that the roundtrip would cost me no more than 50 rupees. He also said "tip, tip" as if the 600 rupees weren't enough. Now he had been a decent tour guide and tried to name the places we'd passed, plus he hadn't gotten me injured or killed. I ended up giving him 450 rupees and told him he could drive me to the Charminar on Sunday. More on that later.

May I have an IPA?

If you ask that question in India, the answer will be "No, sorry." Why? Because they don't brew it here. Indians have beer - lots of it, just no India Pale Ale's.

Here is a history lesson for you (only because someone asked about this topic). The brewing business was started here by, who else, the Brits. During colonial/occupation times, British subjects set-up the first breweries in order to keep the British expats and soldiers drunk and happy. The IPA was actually invented/created in London and then shipped to India. The strong, highly hopped ale was designed to survive the five month voyage to India (thanks Wikipedia for this history lesson).

Anyhow, the Brits built breweries all over India and ran them until Independence. Now it's a market dominated by one company: United Breweries Limited. They make Kingfisher and a number of other brews. Supposedly the second largest brewer in the world. And I must say, its pretty good beer...

Now you know Suzzle.

Random Observations

I have quickly realized I took a few things for granted at home, not the least was my access to inexpensive wine. I remembered on my last trip here that the wine was pricey, but not until last night did I realize the magnitude of this issue. As I waited for a former work colleague to join me in the hotel bar, I scanned the wine list. Out jumped what has to be the most ridiculous thing I'd ever seen: 2005 Corbett Canyon Cab - 2500 rupees. Kids, that translates to about $55. This is the same wine you can buy at Safeway for $6 a bottle or at the Embassy Suites in Lubbock, TX for $18 (I swear, I looked it up).

Next problem: coffee. I tried in vane to order a plain old cup of black coffee this morning. The poor woman looked at me like I'd ordered crack pancakes for breakfast. Me: "Can I have a large coffee?" Her: "Cappucino?" Me: "No, coffee, black, tall." Her: "Cappucino?" Me: "Sure, sounds great!" Good part of the exchange was it only cost me 50 cents for the fresh cup of what I will now call "coffee" but really is a tall cappucino.

For those of you who expressed fear that I was going to be spending time here, rest assured. I promise I will never try to cross the street unless atop an elephant or in a car, nor will I ever try to drive a car. Besides the fact they drive on the wrong side of the road (thanks Queen Victoria!), they also adhere to a very bizarre ritual of not using signals or lanes and using their horns as a method of communicating. They also think nothing of cutting each other off at high speeds and passing in between lanes. Explains why they have about 85,000 road fatalities a year here. I might start wearing a helmet in the car just to be safe.

The Journey

Ah, the joys of travel!

The trip started off well - I not only had a car service show up on time, I had two car services show up within ten minutes of each other. Nothing like a brawl over a $125 fare!

The actual travel time to India is about 24 hours. Hour to the airport, two hours to check-in, eight hour flight to Frankfurt, another four hour layover, eight hours to Hyderabad, an hour to get your luggage, and then five minutes to the hotel. Makes for a long day.

For the record, I'm staying in Hyderabad - a large city located in south central India. It's the home to many U.S. and Indian high tech and professional services firms. It has all the amenities of home - insane traffic, erratic drivers, a Pizza Hut, an Irish pub, and a Baskin-Robbins. We don't even have one of those in DC yet! Hotel is quite nice - the Indians have the service thing down.

Keep visiting for my updates. I'm here for six weeks and will hopefully have some fun stories and side trips to share. As always, you can reach me on e-mail.